35 on turning 35

Lisa Downey
13 min readJul 14, 2023

Wow! I cannot believe it’s been a full year since I last wrote. What did I do in that year? I know- LOVED & LIVED!

Turning 34, I was SWEPT up in that lavender haze Taylor Swift talks about, the whirlwind adrenaline, excitement, butterflies, and everything in between.

Now, turning 35, I am still in the haze, giddy, love heart eyed, but feeling safe, secure and empowered in a relationship I never knew could exist. Okay, enough lovey dovey stuff, more on that later, but today, as I sit in my childhood bedroom, pondering on turning 35 (really? I’m 35? no way!), I am feeling very zen, very reflective and grateful, so here it goes:

  1. Always strive for the positives, even on the darkest days. There is always some light buried under the anxiety of a situation, you just have to seek it out. When I attend the hospital with my dad, heart thumping, I often look for a smiling nurse, laughter in the cafe, the sun shining that day, a song I like on the radio, and most times the love between people as they support each other in the ‘not so easy’ circumstances of life. These light moments are what gets me through, and gives me hope, always.
  2. Sorry, I know I’ve said it before, but 35, like WTH! I remember at 16 thinking 35 was like 70, old AF, and now I honestly feel in the prime of my life, the happiest I have felt, and such excitement for the future. Kids, age is just what they write on the birth cert, it’s what’s in your heart, or how your back aches on a given day, but for the purposes of this blog, we will go with the young feeling of 26 lol.
  3. Stay present. Most of us whizz around on autopilot, and sometimes it is necessary, but sometimes the most beautiful moments are in taking in the meal you just cooked, eating it mindfully, and savouring every bite. Fully embrace as many moments as you can, it’s always the small things that add up to the big things in this life!
  4. Travel, whenever possible. This past year I have been on approximately 24 flights, trains, buses, taxis, boats, you name it. New experiences, familiar experiences, new people, places and memories. I adore travel and meeting people, great food, new places, music, laughter, curating joy! Travel I feel lightens you, gives you incredible memories, stories, friendships, and more, and I am just very grateful I found a wonderful person who feels the same, and together we will give Richard Branson a run for his money.
  5. Don’t forget to rest. Even if you think you’re 21, you’re so not! I am very bad at resting and relaxing, always wanting to go, go, go and do,do,do, but rest is equally as important. My body and mind tells me to rest, forces me to rest if I don’t listen, and after a solid 9 hour sleep, or a few hours reading, I feel inspired, excited and ready again. I will cherish sleep forever, and make it a priority to rest and recoup that energy as much as possible!
  6. Choose to be invincible every Tuesday! I just chose Tuesday, but any day or days you want, choose to wake up and say ‘I got this’, I am empowered, I am ready, I am able, this day is my b*tch, lol. Whatever mantras and affirmations you use, just feel it, and even if you deep down feel like it’s cringey, just fake it and put those wonder woman pants on and feel like on Tuesday’s we get sh*t done!
  7. Know your worth! I am preaching this to myself as well as you. In work, friendship, health, in life in general. Know you deserve more in areas of your life you feel you’re not valued. Ask for more money at work, take those lunch breaks good and proper, make time for a ‘me’ day, ask your loved ones for support, ditch the ones who drain your cup, and spend more time with the ones who fill you up. Believe me, these people become more transparent as you get older! You owe it to yourself to do that yoga class, to enjoy a good meal, to laugh at the cinema, to buy that dress you’ve been ogling over, do it- do it for you!
  8. Running off the energy vampires from above and the importance of energy givers, please sign up to some nice IG, email or Twitter, FB groups and organisations with positive words. I receive newsletters from ‘A note from the Universe’ Monday-Friday, and they honestly give me such a pep in my step reading them! Every Thursday I also receive an email from James Clear (NYT Best seller of Atomic Habits), and he makes me reflect and also kicks me up the a**. So many gorgeous pages on IG, and I am sure on the other platforms too, but just try to give yourself those little positive nudges amongst the chaos of social media land.
  9. Gratitude lists 4 lyf! I love writing down my gratitude list at night time, and now my boyfriend and I list 3 things we’re grateful for before bed, and it’s just fills you up so much. It’s important to remind yourself of the good moments of the day, even the smallest thing of a nice cup of coffee, to a great day at work, meeting friends, cuddling on the sofa, whatever, they are all reasons to be joyful and grateful!
  10. Meditation is key! I cannot sleep without meditation these days. My mind needs those soft tones to drift off to, even if I only hear 2 minutes before I am snoozing. Giving your brain some time to switch off, to not focus on anything, to relax, to unwind, to recoup. I know it can be hard, but the endless benefits make it worth it!
  11. Reiki, reiki, reiki. My healing, and my peace. I spoke about this aged 33, but I really can’t say enough about the peace, hope and calmness found with reiki. The feeling you’re protected, loved, and able to do anything. Like a wardrobe clear out, but for your energy, it’s amazing, you have to try it!!
  12. Alcohol is fun and all, but have you tried 0%? I can’t take the hangovers anymore, and days wasted, but also, I can’t take the effect alcohol has on my body. 0% alcohol has taken a valued place in my life this year, and my nights are exactly the same, but with less sh*t feelings the next day. My mind and liver thank me for this switch, and it’s a game changer. Same fun, same taste, but way better side effects! Try it, you’ll be surprised!
  13. Scary can be good! I think covid made me way more of a scaredy cat than I ever was before, but now it’s time to take the reins back (slowly but surely). Leaving the comfort zone is terrifying, or leaving the family home! Another milestone for me this year, a scary one, life changing and absolutely amazing decision. I am so grateful to be able to wake up with the man I love, have coffee in bed on Sunday mornings, plan our future together, and have my own space as me Lisa. Taking that chance on love, the new opportunity at work, the new class you attended, new friends, new hobbies, it’s all positive towards your development, and as they say- it’s a win or a lesson, and both are good outcomes.
  14. Believe in love, because it is real. I always believed in fairytales, until I didn’t. I think we all give up on finding ‘the one’ at some point in our lives. Hey, no one said it was easy, it’s a process, but take it from me, real love exists, it’s not just in the movies.
  15. Okay, from this, I need to tell you that I am head over heels, heart on my sleeve, butterflies, pink hearts and #blessed to be IN LOVE. Not just any type of love, nope! The one that far exceeded what I could have dreamt of, the one who saw my manifestation list, ticked it off and then some. The one who loves to watch 90 day fiance with me, play WWE in the pool, and tell me how incredible I am, even when I look like an extra from LOR! I could write a thesis on this, but it wouldn’t be enough to show you how happy I am with my love, but I will say this- tonight I am having a birthday dinner with my parents and boyfriend, and I never thought it would happen. Honestly, never! Never thought I would be so madly in love with someone so incredible, and to spend my birthday with him and my parents, just so so simple, but something so important to me. As I say all the time, when I count my blessings, I count him (the bf) twice, and tonight, I will count three times!
  16. Speaking of love. I think our love changes and is shaped differently as we age. I am an only child and adore my parents, and adored the covid bubble we lived in together as a trio. Now, as I live with my love, I appreciate them in a new way, a different way. I treasure our time together more, I get excited to see them, I am grateful they’re still here, and we can spend time together. It’s a new chapter of life, and love, and as scary as it was at the start, it’s become a beautiful thing.
  17. I know not everyone gets on with their parents, and I do have the odd fight and cross words, but as I age, and they do, I sadly (sad note incoming) realise they won’t be here forever, and it breaks my heart. *Grabs tissues. We all know this, but as life, health, age, etc comes at us, it’s frustrating, upsetting, sad, angry, everything, but it does make you really grab onto the things you love and hold them tight (see always a positive). I have a new level of reflection on this subject, and I really wish I didn’t, but it not only makes me grateful for them and our time and happiness together, but for other areas of my life I wanna treasure too. So hug your parents, tell them you love them, kiss their cheeks and never stop annoying them, and always make time for each other!!
  18. I am obsessed with frames. I have always loved pictures, but I am next level with picture frames on walls, memories, quotes, affirmations, memes, photo of Britney and K-Fed (don’t ask). I love a wall full of smiley faces, happy times, positive vibes and pure and utter joy, in whatever that looks like for you. Fills my heart, my soul, and my wall ;)
  19. Ted Lasso!!! How did I not know about this show before May this year! My boyfriend introduced me this year as S3 was about to begin, and we devoured it in days. The most heart warming, lovely, hug of a show, and I really wish it didn’t end. Go watch it on Apple Tv if you haven’t yet!
  20. Sometimes I wish mitching days were possible in adult life. Mitching, aka skiving, aka ditching school was rare for me as a kid, but something I always wanted to do! I wish as a tired adult we could mitch and have the air of mystery around it, still get paid and not get into trouble, not asking for much am I? Lol. Bring back the excitement of youth!
  21. Remote working is the MVP. One great thing from covid is the opportunity to work in pajamas all day! I mean, work in casual relaxed clothes! Lol. In reality, the freedom of working from home means more sleep, way less stress, no Sunday fear, the chance to work abroad, to work more flexible time (for me anyway), and much more! I don’t think I could ever go to an office full time, I think I would break out into a rash!
  22. Ireland, the place I call home, my motherland, the place I got tattooed on my back for God’s sake, well, Ireland, you’re acting like a teenager, and you need to quit it! Housing crisis, homelessness, cost of living crisis, politicians against each other, it’s a lot for the youth of today, and sadly we are losing them to other countries, and I really don’t blame them. I love this country, rain and all, but it hurts my heart how it’s impossible for so many to buy, to live good lives, to turn to Australia, leave everything to be able to actually live, and not just survive. I hope change is coming!
  23. Reading is essential. I have about 10 self-dev books on my shelf, and 0 fiction. I always want to educate myself, become aware of my being and all that jazz, but thanks to the bf again, he re-introduced me to books that help me escape life and to just relax. We read together, which I thought was dorky at the start, and now adore!! It’s a renewed hobby for me, and it’s freedom and I just love it. Read books kids!
  24. Therapy, counselling, life coaching, whatever you’re into, do it, it’s always worth it. I attend counselling sessions, and let me tell you, I am a happier, more fulfilled, less anxious human because of counselling. I have also attended a life coach this year, and all these professionals help open your eyes, heart and mind to possibilities, hold your hand in tough times, and give you the strength to go again. My only regret- not doing it sooner! #therapyisforeveryone
  25. Friendships are so varied! I have friends of all ages, religions, nationalities, and I just love it. What I have learned from getting older is, friends are great, but some are there for certain life periods, some for certain purposes, some forever, and the older you get, the more you realise their friendship status, and how you accept it for what it is, embrace that, and not get hurt for what it isn’t! Some friends you party with, some you talk career with, some are your biggest cheerleaders, some are your counsellors, some just a casual check in once in a while. Know the status, and you’ll live better!
  26. TikTok has taught me more this year than any platform! Hello, cleaning TikTok, DIY TikTok, social media hack TikTok, and then cute doggy TikToks. I love this app, it kept me going through covid, and I miss the dances, but it’s my №1 and apart from teaching me how to clean a shower door correctly, it’s also taught me about heatless curls, concealer tricks, and how to make oatmeal brownies! Win, win!
  27. Music is just wonderful. Concerts are amazing, and if you can, listen to live music and just dance, sing and enjoy every moment. Recently, my boyfriend and I went to see Lionel Richie, and it was amazing, we were dancing on the ceiling (see what I did there). I also went to my first ever festival #seasessions, and I loved every second, again get out of that comfort session and embrace the glamping life!!
  28. I think I am more confident in my older age. I no longer squirm at the thought of leaving the house with no make-up, I show my freckles to the world, and smile with ease. I kinda blame covid for the lack of care about make-up, and also my happiness with my love. I love me for me, he loves me for me, and that’s how it should be.
  29. I was a climate ambassador for Ireland. Honestly, a proud moment, but also extremely terrifying and upsetting learning about how the world could look in 2050- spoiler alert, it’s awful! Please give what you can to help tackle the crisis, recycle, buy second hand clothes, electric vehicles, upgrade energy efficiency in your home, educate yourself, your community, and be aware of how green you are. I like to offset my carbon due to flying by paying extra when booking, I also choose to cycle more, and not use my car. I don’t buy from fast fashion houses, I re-use, recycle and shout about climate change to whoever will listen! Save the polar bears!
  30. There is no timeline of life. I am the only one of my friends child-free, and the only one sleeping well, so who’s winning here? Joking! I do want children, but I also want to enjoy my life with my man, travel, go to festivals, football matches, Sunday brunches, weekends away, just us. Don’t listen to society, you should do this by this age BS, nope! You do things on your clock, and smile at their jealous faces when you do all the things they said you couldn’t!
  31. You read that right, I said football matches. Wolverhampton Wanderers to be precise! My love Ryan is from wolves, and thanks to him I now own around 4 wolves jerseys, and been to 4 games so far, with 3 coming up in the next 2 months! Never would have guessed that for myself, but I love it!
  32. Homeware > make-up and clothes. Again, who am I? I once would spend 100’s in duty free on make-up, and now it seems it’s in Dunnes or Penney’s home, the range or home bargains! A good deal on matching cushions now outweighs the thrill of a new blusher!
  33. Is luck really a thing? Are you lucky to have met the man of your dreams or do you deserve him? Are you lucky to get that job, or did you work damn hard for it? I do believe winning a few millions on the lotto is lucky, but the rest? I think we do it ourselves, with hard work, determination, ambition and of course that wonderful visualisation that takes your manifestation into reality!
  34. Looking after yourself, mind, body and soul is hugely important at any age, but especially important as we get older. You have to look after your mental health as much as the physical. Get out walking, into nature, dance, laugh, connect with others, seek help if life is getting too much, it really does help. Try keep fit, work your muscles before you lose them, give 60 year old you a shot at doing yoga! Feel anything weird, go to the dr, don’t let it slip. We have one precious life, look after it, and make sure you’re around for the best of it, while looking super hot!
  35. Content! Defined as being ‘in a state of peaceful happiness’. I am content, and I am so bloody grateful for it! As I step into 35, I feel safe, hopeful, excited, loved, secure, relaxed, inspired, and I don’t think I have felt that for a very long time *grabs tissues again.

Younger Lisa would probably judge me for typing this in a Lisa Simpsons t-shirt, and Christmas pj bottoms, sitting in my childhood bedroom, child-less, not married, not a director at Google, not living in a mansion somewhere, but I am HAPPY, and I am exactly where I am supposed to be, and you are too!

Happy Birthday to me, and to all my July 17th kids, we got this! x

--

--

Lisa Downey

An eternal optimist, content creation from my heart & soul, marketing by day, manifesting by night. Irish with dreams bigger than this whole island.